This is why I will never travel the path North West

I try to understand celebrities, I really do. But then they always go off the deep end and do things that I just cannot wrap my head around. They jump on stage and demand that someone else gets an award that means literally nothing because it’s being sponsored by MTV. They claim that the then-president hates black people. They also do things like name their children weird names, like North West. Oh wait, I’m thinking of one celebrity in particular. If you can’t guess from the clues, it’s Kanye West.

Don’t get me wrong, I used to kind of like his music. And I am generally not one to listen to rap. My brother has his College Dropout album among a mix of various other songs and I would listen and learn the words just like everyone else. He had a song about Jesus and so I assumed he had some sanity. Little did I know that those are the least sane sometimes. I’m looking at you, Mel Gibson. Gold Digger, of course, was a staple at quinceaneras and school dances. And then after that I stopped listening to him because I just wasn’t feeling that kind of music.

I’m afraid to speak any sort of ill-will toward him because I feel like he has friends in equally high and low places. Pissing him off might resort in him doing something absolutely bonkers like telling Kim and then they would gossip about me on their reality show. Don’t even get me started on why she’s “famous.” Because for some reason there are people that admire her. Like, yeah, good job for picking yourself up after you made a raunchy sex tape, but do not even try to pretend to be an example for young girls. But again, I don’t even imagine that my miniscule blog would anger them to the point of anything I previously mentioned.

Really what I’m here to talk about is why would you name a child North? Some people like it. Others make fun of it. What I’m most concerned about is the well being of that child. Going through life as “North?!” I probably shouldn’t be worried. She’s going to be rich and taken care of so if anyone does anything to make her upset she’ll have them thrown in their dungeon where they keep Bruce Jenner. But still, you have to imagine that she’ll wonder why her mom and dad are hated and then when she gets older and develops a pre-teen attitude, she’ll wonder why they’re worshiped.

I am sure North will be loved, and in the end, no matter how much I poke fun at her parents, that’s really all that matters.  

This is why I am grateful to America's Next Top Model

I have been having marathon events of the shows Parks & Rec and Veronica Mars. While I've seen both shows before, I just can’t help it. They’re so good. While I was on my latest episode of VM I thought to myself, “Wow, there aren't very many shows like this.” Usually all female-heavy shows are doing something ridiculous, you know, like getting pregnant at 16 or trying to flatly be sexy. I’m just going to say it: there needs to be more female-empowered shows (okay so any gender-empowered shows).

I am not a feminist by any means. I don’t claim to be because I’m not sure what doing so would mean and frankly I haven’t had the time or desire to look into it. All I know is I want basic opportunities for women equal to that of men. The way I justify it is how would I want my future daughters to view a subject or be treated? So when I turn on the TV and find out that 30 Rock has finished and Parks and Rec doesn't get the attention it deserves, I get a little peeved.

The cancellation of VM back in 2007 broke my heart. I was obsessed with the show. It was the first show that I truly loved. I fell upon it by accident. I think I was just watching an episode of America’s Next Top Model and saw a commercial for it. Oh the irony of watching ANTM. I was only in 7^th grade back in 2004 when it started and seeing a girl in high school who solved crimes and could figure her own stuff out was intriguing. I went from wanting to be the next top model to wanting to work as a detective.

While I’m not going to be a detective at all because my sense of observation is pretty weak-sauce, at least the show took a young impressionable viewer from wanting to work in a cut-throat industry where looks are everything to wanting to be a sassy, smart, snarky P.I. I would hope that the male viewers also liked it and felt like they could accomplish their goals too. I mean, the shows we are regurgitating to young boys are shows like Two and a Half Men and The Big Bang Theory which don’t bode well.

I was lucky enough to stumble onto VM when I was young, but I don’t know how lucky others were. And while you shouldn't blame everything on the media, I do think that there should be a push for less sex and violence on TV and more shows that let the viewer feel like they can relate to or strive to be better. At the very least we could promote shows that we have no shame in watching and do away with those that focus on stereotypes and negativity.  

This is why "it's only weird if it doesn't work"

Do you remember that commercial last football season that had all of the fans doing weird rituals all for the sake of the game? At the end of the commercial it said, “It’s only weird if it doesn’t work.” I used to laugh and scoff saying, “That’s so dumb.” I’ve always known people who do OCD-qualifying ceremonies all for the love of the game but I was never one to bring that same pressure upon myself. Until recently.

To think that the outcome of a play or even a game could rely on you is so burdensome. But it’s a must. I justify this way of thinking by saying that it’s necessary to send positive vibes to the way of the players you’re rooting for. The reason why you’re rooting for them is entirely up to you (but if you’re rooting for Miami, you’re wrong), because the players need those loving streams of light and encouragement to press on. I know that totally sounds like new-age hippie thinking but I promise it works.

And it’s not like I do anything totally crazy like spin around three times after every play. I just stay with my hands pressed together in the prayer position… the whole game.

Written on 6/7:
I started doing this during the NBA playoffs and it’s worked every time and the times I haven’t done it, we’ve lost. And yes, I include myself in the Spurs roster. We’ve only lost twice in this year’s playoffs so I’m not that concerned. But you can bet I will continue to press my hands together as hard as I possibly can the entire duration of the finals.

Written on 6/11:
Okay so sadly I tried doing my usual method and we still lost. And this wasn’t just any loss. It was an especially brutal one. My man, Danny Green, was 100% that night though. So maybe all my positive thinking worked for him. But I guess it really didn’t work and you can say I’m weird now. I’ll continue to try and make this work tonight, however, as it is game 3. I won’t give up. Unless it absolutely doesn’t work tonight. Then I will probably stop trying with my hand gestures.

On a separate but related note, I firmly believe everyone should be rooting for the Spurs on this one. They’re a classy team. They win. They believe in hard work and sticking with your team in an age where the highest bidder gets the superstar. It’s no secret that Coach Pop is generally admired and respected whereas Coach Spoelstra is a good coach but gets no respect. His players hardly even listen to him. The Heat are the complete opposite of the Spurs and if that’s who you want to root for, that’s your choice. Your NBA, your choice, I know. But I’m just saying; if you care about what is right with the NBA go with the Spurs.

So go Spurs go and I will continue to do what I can to cheer on my team.

This is why I get too emotional about Selena

There is no escaping the 90s craze that my generation can’t seem to get enough of. I won’t buy into it. However, there if there is one thing that I smile with glee and say “now that’s 90s” it’s Selena. If you have no idea who I’m talking about you might be surprised to learn that I think you need to get with the times. No, but if you absolutely don’t know who I’m talking about then I shall inform you.

Selena Quintanilla-Perez was a 20-something year old Tejano singer from southern Texas. She was huge because not only did she find success in Tejano music, but she also crossed over to more American traditional Pop music. Sadly, the president of her fan club shot her in 1995 and she didn’t make it. I was too young to remember that growing up. But the whole reason I remember this information is probably the same reason you do too if you didn’t live it.

Thanks to the breakout role of Jennifer Lopez, Selena (the movie), stuck with audiences for a long time. I had an on-going thing with one of my friends that we would always watch the movie thinking “Oh no, she’ll make it this time,” but sadly it never happened. So why is this what I will proudly claim as my 90s fandom?  Because of Selena Gomez.

I have nothing at all against Selena Gomez. Except when people call her Selena. She isn’t the original! In fact, she has said that she was named after Selena Quintanilla-Perez. So if this is the case, then there are millions of young children who are obsessed with Selena Gomez and have no idea how important the original Selena was to millions of young children in the 90s through today.

I am sure that the same could be said for any namesake. I was named after the mother of Jesus and no one really recognizes that. But that’s not as important as being named after Selena!!! (Okay that was totally a joke, all my Catholic brethren, please do not get offended). I just think people need to realize where others have been and that includes the realization of the fact that the original Selena means a lot to people all over the world and we would do “anything for Selenas!”