This is why I need to go to rehab for my addiction to the color pink.

I’ve always felt the need to have extremes of everything. I will really passionately love something, or I will very angrily and strongly dislike something. Okay, so I don’t like to “hate” anything (except for Nickleback, but I feel justified in that). This makes it sound like I am very political and protest in the streets and started the whole “Occupy Movement”, but I am just referring to things like my favorite color. I have an addiction problem to the color pink. It all started when I was 5 and in kindergarten. It was Valentine’s Day and some little snot-nosed kid had the audacity to run up to his little sister and say “Your favorite color is pink, right?” 

Now, it’s not that I didn’t like this girl—except for the distinct trait that is inherently placed in all females at the time of conception which dictates that any girl must have a beef with any other girl that they know absolutely nothing about. I don’t even remember this girl’s name. At the time, my brother, Wesley, was going through this phase where he only liked bands that didn’t have a huge fan base. Once they got big, he stopped liking them. He was like a hipster before their time. So I guess that makes him the ultimate hipster, since he was a hipster to hipsters.  Well, he had a major influence on me. Once I learned that someone else loved something equally or more than me, I stopped loving it. Not all things, though; I wouldn’t give up loving Power Rangers or Lisa Frank. I was 5 and it was the 90s. I didn’t quite understand all the rules of being a hipster, yet. 

Once this boy decided that his sister was in love with the color pink, I was instantly done, the way that Kim Kardashian was done with her sham of a marriage in a matter of 9 minutes. I was not having it. None of the other girls in my class loved the color purple. So bam. Purple ruled my clothes and backpacks and Lisa Frank pencils for a good chunk of my life. I know what you’re thinking: it sounds ridiculous that I am putting so much importance on a color, but I’ll get to that. So for a good majority of time I secretly and longingly looked to my former favorite color as it taunted and called to me.

So why all of a sudden to I have an addiction to the color pink? Well, I can’t tell you exactly what it was. Maybe it was time for a change. Or maybe I realized a lot of girls now really don’t like the color pink and somewhere in my deep subconscious I still like that. In rough times, some people turn to drugs, or drinking, or listening to Justin Bieber on repeat, but I turned to filling my life with pink. It makes me happy, and at least it’s pretty. It’s not like I’m a crazy cat lady. Unless, you know, the cat is pink. 

When I was living in the dorms for college, most of my stuff was pink. When I moved back home we decided to repaint my room, and you guessed it, my walls are pink. My phone, my pillows, my purse are all pink. My TV’s black, but when I saw a similar one that was pink a part of me died on the inside. This is probably more relevant to girls. Guys go through this sort of thing, right? But with MW3 and… eating? I don’t know.  What do you want from me? It’s a beautiful color. To deny it would be to deny the very core of who I am. Okay, so maybe that’s a bit dramatic, but whatever. I know, I need help.