This is why NBA speed dating needs to be a thing

It’s just about that time again where I mention that I have this brilliant idea and someone in the industry needs to read this to make it happen. A few nights ago I had this dream that I was speed dating. It wasn’t just any ‘ole speed dating (I mean, why would I go speed dating, right? Except that it’s totally plausible and will inevitably happen one day), it was NBA speed dating. So here’s how the dream went:

I sit down at the bar or table or whatever it was and was given a card with an NBA team on it. Then, walks over Kris Humphries and we begin to talk about the team on the card as a segue to normal talk. It just so happened to be the Spurs and he said they suck and I just happened to slap him and tell him his sham of a marriage sucked more. So he got up. The next card that I was given was for the Magic and Russell Westbrook sat down wearing his infamous fake glasses and “I-don’t-care” attitude. He said that he didn’t think the Thunder would ever play the Magic and he was all sorts of boring. Next on the list was my all-time favorite (and potentially future husband), Patty Mills. Sadly, at this point I woke up.

I awoke and had this awesome idea that it would be so cool if this happened. As in, line up basketball players and have everyday people win opportunities to attend the event and of course have super rich people there too to fund it, and everything goes to charity! Perhaps even during the All Star Weekend so that way everyone’s together already.

I know this would probably never happen, but what if it did? Fans got to meet all kinds of NBA stars and all the stars had to do would be to donate their time. Of course, their egos are probably way too big to let this ever happen, but I’m sure some of them would be down for it. I could dream, right? Meeting all those people and slapping Kris Humphries would probably be the best thing that would ever happen to me, ever.